Author Archive for seanconneryday

League of Extraordinary Gentlemen Film Quotes

Sean Connery as Allan Quartermain in The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)


Allan Quartermain: Jekyll, come on! We’ll need Hyde!
Dr. Henry Jekyll: No! Hyde will never use me again.
Dorian Gray: Then what good are you?

Allan Quatermain: Ah, you’re missing a picture, Mr. Gray.
Dorian Gray: And you don’t miss a thing, do you, Mr. Quatermain?
Allan Quatermain: Oh, sometimes.


Mina Harker: A man who worships death. Can we trust him?
Allan Quatermain: He’s not the one I’m worried about.

Allan Quartermain: Well, we were the faster, but now we’re the tortoise to his hare.
Dr. Henry Jekyll: So, we’re done?
Tom Sawyer: No, we’re alive. If M has any idea to the contrary, that gives us an edge.
Captain Nemo: The sea is vast, he could be anywhere.
Tom Sawyer: Yeah, well, I’m an optimist, now maybe that’s a crime to you twisted so-and-so’s but it keeps me from going crazy.
Mina Harker: Your optimism’s out of place.
Tom Sawyer: You’re wrong! Because we’ll get out, man… at least, I will. That other agent I told you about… was my childhood friend. We were agents together until the Fantom shot him dead. Now you can be done, but I am not. I will avenge his death.
Dr. Henry Jekyll: It’s not about any one of us, Tom, it’s bigger than that.
Tom Sawyer: Yes, it is, Jekyll! The fate for the world is in our hands… the world! So M tricked you, he brought you all together and you walked straight into his trap. But the way that I see it, that’s the part he did wrong… He brought you together.
Dr. Henry Jekyll: He has a point.
Allan Quartermain: And the boy becomes a man… perhaps a leader of men.
Mina Harker: And Women.

Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man): And they’ll provide an antidote… well, that’s if I’m a good boy.
Allan Quatermain: And are you a good boy?
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man): I guess you’ll find out, won’t you?

Allan Quatermain: If you can’t do it with one bullet, don’t do it at all.

Sanderson Reed: Where is your sense of patriotism?
Allan Quatermain: [stands up with a drink] God save the Queen.
[the other patrons of the club mutter an apathetic return to the toast]
Nigel: God save her.
Allan Quatermain: [to Reed] That’s about as patriotic as it gets around here.

Allan Quatermain: Automatic rifles. Who in God’s name has automatic rifles?
Elderly Hunter: Dashed unsporting. Probably Belgian.

Sanderson Reed: They’re indestructible.
Allan Quatermain: No, just armor-plated.

Allan Quatermain: Now, would you like to learn to shoot?
Tom Sawyer: I can already.
Allan Quatermain: Oh, I saw. Very American. Fire enough bullets and hope to hit the target.

[Mina jumps and gasps like something just grabbed her behind]
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man): I’ve been waiting all week to do that.
Allan Quatermain: Get a grip, man.
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man): Well, I thought I just did.
[Mina slaps him]
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man): Oooh, Mina…
Captain Nemo: Report.
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man): Well, hello to you, too. And need I remind you, I am naked in the snow. I can’t feel any of my extremities. And I mean… any of them.

Sanderson Reed: There is great unrest. Countries set at each other’s throats, baying for blood. It’s a powder-keg. The trouble of which I speak could set a match to the whole thing: War.
Allan Quatermain: Wi-With whom, exactly?
Sanderson Reed: Everyone. A world war.
Allan Quatermain: That notion makes you sweat?
Sanderson Reed: Heavens, man. Doesn’t it you?
Allan Quatermain: This is Africa, dear boy. Sweating is what we do.

Allan Quatermain: I may have been overly rude earlier… when I called you a pirate.
Captain Nemo: And I may have been overly charitable… when I said I wasn’t. But I try to live in the now… where the ghosts of old wrongs do not abide.

[after throwing the invisible man out of his room]
Allan Quatermain: Skinner, I want you dressed at all times, eh? Or it’s my boot up your arse.

Nigel: Perhaps I should toddle off, should I, Allan?
Allan Quatermain: Yes, of course, Nigel. You toddle off.
Nigel: Toddling.

Sanderson Reed: But you’re Allan Quatermain. Stories of your exploits have thrilled English boys for decades.
Allan Quatermain: That I know. And Nigel has done a grand job reminding me. But… with each past exploit I’ve lost friends, white men and black… and much more. And I’m not the man I once was.

[to Tom Sawyer]
Allan Quatermain: May this new century be yours, son, as the old one was mine.

Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man): So, how did M get you?
Allan Quatermain: None of your business.
Mina Harker: You’re a little testy, Mr. Q.
Allan Quatermain: Mrs. Harker, I doubt if you measure danger the way I do.
Mina Harker: And I imagine you with quite the library, Mr. Quatermain. All those books you must have read merely by looking at their covers.
Allan Quatermain: I’ve had women along on past exploits, and found them to be, at best, a distraction.
Mina Harker: Do I distract you?
Allan Quatermain: My dear girl, I’ve buried two wives and many lovers… and I’m in no mood for more of either.
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man): You can send ‘em my way.
Allan Quatermain: Skinner, shut up.

M: I hope I’ve got your fire when I’m your age.
Allan Quatermain: You will not live beyond today. That I promise you.

Sanderson Reed: The Empire needs you.
Allan Quatermain: But the question is, do I need the Empire?

M: They’ve discovered these attacks are all the work of one man who calls himself the Phantom
Allan Quatermain: Very operatic. And what’s in it for him?

Allan Quatermain: [sniffs air] He’s afraid.
Tom Sawyer: [sniffs air] I don’t smell anything.

Allan Quatermain: I don’t like theatrics.
M: After Africa’s veldts, London’s climate isn’t affecting your mood, I see…
Allan Quatermain: Identify yourself.
M: I am known by many names, Mr. Quatermain. My underlings call me Sir. My superiors call me M.
Allan Quatermain: M?
M: Just M.

M: To the death. But you’ll need Hyde to make it mine.
Allan Quatermain: He’ll be making his own fight.

[Quatermain pulls Sawyer out from under some falling rubble]
Allan Quatermain: Heh. That was naughty.
Tom Sawyer: Thanks.
Allan Quatermain: Eyes open, boy. I can’t protect you all the time.

Rodney Skinner (the Invisible Man): Hello, Dorian. The great white hunter’s bagged his prize.
[they hear and see men being thrashed]
Dorian Gray: Or the prize bagged him.
[Quatermain is corraling Mr. Hyde]
Allan Quatermain: Stay back, if you value your lives.

Allan Quatermain: [being lead down a staircase that doesn’t seem to end] Where are we going? Australia?

Allan Quartermain: [after the exploration pod has been stolen] We can track it.
Captain Nemo: Track it? I intend to catch it!

Allan Quartermain: Chilao!
[a target is slung into the ocean. Sawyer hoists the elephant gun]
Allan Quartermain: Aim.
Tom Sawyer: That’s easy.
Allan Quartermain: Adjust for wind and target movement.
Tom Sawyer: That’s easy, too.
Allan Quartermain: Here’s the part that’s not. You have to feel the shot. Take your time with it. You have all the time you need. All the time in the world.

[Allan aims his elephant gun at a fleeing assassin]
Sanderson Reed: But he’s so far away.
[Allan lowers the gun with a grunt of frustration]
Sanderson Reed: Yes, I thought he was.
[Allan puts on a pair of glasses]
Allan Quartermain: God, I hate getting old.
[He aims the rifle and fires. In the far distance, the assassin goes down. Reed gapes]

Allan Quartermain: The Phantom is M. And the hunt is still on.
Dr. Henry Jekyll: What are you talking about?
Allan Quartermain: The Phantom is M. The same man who recruited us.
Dr. Henry Jekyll: [trying to examine Allan’s wound] Let me see that.
[he is shrugged off]
Captain Nemo: But how?
Allan Quartermain: We’ll get our answers. Where are the others?
Mina Harker: [entering] Dorian’s missing in action. And Mr. Skinner must have fled when he realized we knew.
Allan Quartermain: [concerned] Sawyer?
Tom Sawyer: [entering with a bloody lip] He’ll live to fight another day.
Mina Harker: [advances towards Tom, he draws back] Don’t worry, I’ve had my fill of throats for this evening.

 
Please share other Connery quotes or any other thoughts/memories you have about the film in the comments below.  Thank you for your interest in Sean Connery and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.

Post by Chad Elkins. Source: IMDB

The Rock Film Quotes

Sean Connery as John Patrick Mason in The Rock (1996)

 

Stanley Goodspeed: Why didn’t you just tell them were the microfilm was and create a solution?
John Mason: The moment they had the microfilm, they’d suicide me. Some solution.

General Hummel: Did they bother to tell you who I am and why I’m doing this or are they just using you like they do everybody else?
John Mason: All I know is that you were big in Vietnam, I saw the highlights on television.
General Hummel: Then you probably have no idea what it means to lead some of the finest men on God’s earth into combat and then watch their memories get betrayed by their own fucking government.
John Mason: I don’t quite see how you cherish the memory of the dead by killing another million. And, this is not combat, it’s an act of lunacy, General Sir. Personally, I think you’re a fucking idiot.
General Hummel: “The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants.” Thomas Jefferson.
John Mason: “Patriotism is a virtue of the vicious,” according to Oscar Wilde.
[Hummel strikes him, and he falls to his knees]
John Mason: Thank you for making my point.
General Hummel: Where are the guidance chips?
[Points his gun at Mason’s head]
General Hummel: WHERE ARE THE GUIDANCE CHIPS?
John Mason: I’ve destroyed them.
General Hummel: That was a bad move, soldier.

John Mason: I’m fed up saving your ass. I’m amazed you ever got past puberty.

[about killing]
Stanley Goodspeed: How do you… do it?
John Mason: I was trained by the best. British intelligence. But in retrospect I would rather have been a poet. Or a farmer.
Stanley Goodspeed: Okay.

John Mason: When all this is over, you’ll go back home driving Carla and your baby insane in your beige Volvo. And I’ll be dead, or back in prison which is the same thing.

Stanley Goodspeed: “I’d take pleasure in guttin’ you, boy. I’d take pleasure in guttin’ you… boy.” What is wrong with these people, huh? Mason? Don’t you think there’s a lot of, uh, a lot of anger flowing around this island? Kind of a pubescent volatility? Don’t you think? A lotta angst, a lot of “I’m sixteen, I’m angry at my father” syndrome? I mean grow up! We’re stuck on an island with a bunch of violence-for-pleasure-seeking psycophatic marines, SHAME-ON-THEM!
[clears throat]
Stanley Goodspeed: Anyway, I only got one chem round, and there’s two left… Mason?
John Mason: Yes, I’m here. I was just thinking how wonderful it was when the inmates weren’t allowed to talk in here.

Stanley Goodspeed: Hi, I’m an agent with the federal… FBI… Well, my, I’m Stanley Goodspeed.
John Mason: But of course you are.
Agent Paxton: Well, at least he got his name right.
Stanley Goodspeed: Of course I am.
John Mason: And you have an emergency.
Stanley Goodspeed: Right.
John Mason: And you need my help.
Stanley Goodspeed: Exactly right.
John Mason: Coffee.
Stanley Goodspeed: No, I’m fine, thank you.
John Mason: Offer me coffee.

John Mason: Are you sure you’re ready for this?
Stanley Goodspeed: I’ll do my best.
John Mason: Your “best”! Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen.
Stanley Goodspeed: Carla was the prom queen.
John Mason: Really?
Stanley Goodspeed: [cocks his gun] Yeah.

John Mason: I’m sure all this will make a great bed time story to tell your kid.
Stanley Goodspeed: You’re insane, Mason. The kid’ll have nightmares. I’ll spend all my money on shrinks.

Stanley Goodspeed: You enjoying this?
John Mason: Well, it’s certainly more enjoyable than my average day… reading philosophy, avoiding gang rape in the washrooms… though, it’s less of a problem these days. Maybe I’m losing my sex appeal.

[after Mason has killed a Marine, the corpse’s foot twitches]
Stanley Goodspeed: You’ve been around a lot of corpses. Is that normal?
John Mason: What, the feet thing?
Stanley Goodspeed: Yeah, the feet thing.
John Mason: Yeah, it happens.
Stanley Goodspeed: Well I’m having a hard time concentrating. Can you do something about it?
John Mason: Like what, kill him again?

John Mason: I have a unique knowledge of this prison facility. I was formerly a guest here.

Agent Paxton: Mr. Mason, I’m Special Agent-in-Charge Ernest Paxton.
John Mason: In charge of what? Fucking me over for another three decades?
Agent Paxton: I don’t know anything about your previous matters. We’ve brought you here because there’s a situation that we think you can help us with.
John Mason: And what might that be? I’ve been in jail longer than Nelson Mandela, so maybe you want me to run for president.

John Mason: Your mother, well… she was very special.
Jade Angelou: Yes, she was. But I don’t think that we should romanticize what happened between you and her. Meeting in a bar after a Led Zeppelin concert, ya know? And I was the result.
John Mason: Well, I’d like to think it would have led somewhere if only…
Jade Angelou: If only what? Six federal marshals hadn’t kicked down her door and dragged you back to prison?

John Mason: I want a suite, a shower, a shave, the feel of a suit.
Stanley Goodspeed: May I also suggest a haircut?
John Mason: Am I out of style?
Stanley Goodspeed: Unless you’re a 20 year old guitarist from Seattle. It’s a grunge thing.

FBI Director Womack: Just clippers, no scissors.
Paul the Hotel Barber: No scissors, you’ve got to be kidding me, no scissors. I mean, did they tell Picasso “no brush”?
FBI Director Womack: With scissors, this man could kill you.
John Mason: I can’t cut off anyone’s balls with a trimmer, now can I? Why don’t we do this outside? Get some sun.

John Mason: Welcome to the Rock.

John Mason: [Mason and Goodspeed are defusing a poison gas rocket] What exactly does this stuff do?
Stanley Goodspeed: If the rocket renders it aerosol, it could take out the entire city of people.
John Mason: Really? And what happens if you drop one?
Stanley Goodspeed: Happily, it’d just wipe out you and me.
John Mason: How?
Stanley Goodspeed: It’s a cholinesterase inhibitor. Stops the brain from sending nerve messages down the spinal cord within thirty seconds. Any epidermal exposure or inhalation and you’ll know. A twinge at the small of your back as the poison seizes your nervous system…
Stanley Goodspeed: [Mason has lifted the chem round to look at it] DO NOT MOVE THAT! Your muscles freeze, you can’t breathe, you spasm so hard you break your own back and spit your guts out. But that’s after your skin melts off.
John Mason: My God…
Stanley Goodspeed: Oh, I think we’d like God on our side at the moment, don’t you?

John Mason: Timeo Danaos et dona ferentes.
Stanley Goodspeed: “I fear the Greeks even when they bring gifts.”
John Mason: Ah, an educated man.
[Stanley gives a modest wave]
John Mason: That, of course, rules out the possibility of you being a field agent.

John Mason: Womack! Why am I not surprised, you piece of shit!

Stanley Goodspeed: Mason, you all right?
John Mason: [hanging upside down] Yes. Perfectly okay, you fucking idiot.

John Mason: In my day, we did it all with a snorkel and a pair of flippers.

Hotel Barber: Oh, who did this to you? This is just not right. In fact, it’s nasty…
John Mason: It’s a “grunge thing”.

Stanley Goodspeed: Hi, darling, it’s me. Listen, do not come, I repeat, do not come to San Francisco.
Carla: [Answers the phone] Stanley, no.
Stanley Goodspeed: Carla…
Carla: Like hell I’m not comin’!
[Hangs up]
Stanley Goodspeed: Wait, Carla…
[tries to dial again]
John Mason: Who’s Carla, and why don’t you want her to come to San Francisco?
Stanley Goodspeed: You’re on a need-to-know basis… and you do’nt need to know.

Stanley Goodspeed: How’d you do it?
John Mason: Nurtured the hope that there was hope. That one day I’d breathe free air. Perhaps meet my daughter. Modest hopes, but they kept a man alive.

John Mason: I’m only borrowing your Hum-Vee!

John Mason: The Rock has become a tourist attraction?

John Mason: Forget Maui.

Stanley Goodspeed: You’re not leaving! There’s a madman in there with his hand on a… ON A BUTTON!
John Mason: Shh!
[to himself]
John Mason: Some sniper’s gonna get his ass.

Stanley Goodspeed: You’re shooting too close to the rocket! Him, but not the rocket!
John Mason: Any other news, professor?

John Mason: You must see a certain pattern emerging here… Alexander Solzenhitsyn…
Agent Paxton: Yeah, I heard of him. Didn’t he play hockey for the fucking Red Wings?
John Mason: That’s the chap.

John Mason: [to his daughter] You know… you’re almost the only evidence that I exist.

Stanley Goodspeed: You broke out, let me see if I can get this straight, down the incinerator chute, on the mine car, through the tunnels to the power plant, under the steam engine – that was really cool by the way – and into the cistern through the intake pipe. But how, in the name of Zeus’ BUTTHOLE!… did you get out of your cell? I only ask because in our current situation, well, it could prove to be useful information. *Maybe*!
[Mason does not answer, but opens up his prison door with an improvised tool]
Stanley Goodspeed: [Goodspeed hears noise from Mason’s door opening] Mason?
[to Goodspeed’s surprise, his own door suddenly opens]
John Mason: Trade secrets, my son.

John Mason: [as they are escaping] Hummel won’t do it, he’s a soldier not a murderer. I read it in his eyes.
Stanley Goodspeed: You read it in his eyes? I’m sorry, but that’s not a chance I can afford to take!
John Mason: Okay, then talk louder.

Stanley Goodspeed: [Goodspeed knocks Mason off the ledge left hanging by a rope] Are you ok?
John Mason: Perfectly fine you fucking idiot!

FBI Director Womack: Cocksucker!
[Showing Mason his arm in a cast]
John Mason: So, how’s your bowling arm?

Please share other Connery quotes or any other thoughts/memories you have about the film in the comments below.  Thank you for your interest in Sean Connery and The Rock.

Post by Chad Elkins. Source: IMDB

Rising Sun Film Quotes

Sean Connery as Captain John Connor in Rising Sun (1993)


John Connor: The Japanese have a saying, “Fix the problem, not the blame.” Find out what’s fucked up and fix it. Nobody gets blamed. We’re always after who fucked up. Their way is better.

Web Smith: We’re the good guys. Why are we running?
John Connor: We’re not running. We’re eluding.

John Connor: Do you know what’s true? When something sounds too good to be true, then it’s not true.

Web Smith: Where are you from, “sempai”? Scotland Yard?
John Connor: Scotland Backyard.

John Connor: We’re playing that most American of games.
Web Smith: Which is what?
John Connor: Catch-up.

Jeff: You should know, I’m a black belt.
John Connor: But of course you are dear.

John Connor: They say if you resort to violence, then you’ve already lost.

John Connor: We may come from a fragmented MTV rap video culture, but they do not.

John Connor: Is that your theory?
Tom Graham: My theory? My theory is that these guys are known world class perversion freaks.

John Connor: Every aspect of your appearance and behavior will reflect on you, the Department, and me as your sempai.
Web Smith: My sempai?
John Connor: Mm.
Web Smith: That wouldn’t be massa, would it?

 
Please share other Connery quotes or any other thoughts/memories you have about the film in the comments below.  Thank you for your interest in Sean Connery and Rising Sun.

Post by Chad Elkins. Source: IMDB

Untouchables Film Quotes

Sean Connery as Jim Malone in The Untouchables (1987)


Malone: You just fulfilled the first rule of law enforcement: make sure when your shift is over you go home alive. Here endeth the lesson.

Malone: Why do you want to be a police officer?
Williamson: To protect the… people and the… p…
Malone: I’m not looking for the textbook answer. Why do you want to join the force.
Williamson: The force?
Malone: Yeah, why do you want to join the force.
Williamson: Because… I…
Malone: Yeah?
Williamson: …think I could help.
Malone: You think you could help.
Williamson: …with the force.
Malone: Thank you very much, you’ve been most helpful.
[Williamson leaves]
Malone: [to Ness] There goes the next chief of police.

Malone: Why do you want to join the force?
George Stone: To protect the property and citizenry of…
Malone: Ah, don’t waste my time with that bullshit. Where you from, Stone?
George Stone: I’m from the south-side.
Malone: Stone. George Stone. That’s your name? What’s your real name?
George Stone: That is my real name.
Malone: Nah. What was it before you changed it?
George Stone: Giuseppe Petri.
Malone: Ah, I knew it. That’s all you need, one thieving wop on the team.
George Stone: Hey, what’s that you say?
Malone: I said that you’re a lying member of a no good race.
[He cuffs Stone across the face. As he draws back his arm again, Stone presses a gun under his chin]
George Stone: Much better than you, you stinking Irish pig.
Malone: Oh, I like him.

Malone: You said you wanted to get Capone. Do you really wanna get him? You see what I’m saying is, what are you prepared to do?
Ness: Anything within the law.
Malone: And *then* what are you prepared to do? If you open the can on these worms you must be prepared to go all the way. Because they’re not gonna give up the fight, until one of you is dead.
Ness: I want to get Capone! I don’t know how to do it.
Malone: You wanna know how to get Capone? They pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. *That’s* the *Chicago* way! And that’s how you get Capone. Now do you want to do that? Are you ready to do that? I’m offering you a deal. Do you want this deal?
Ness: I have sworn to capture this man with all legal powers at my disposal and I will do so.
Malone: Well, the Lord hates a coward.
[jabs Ness with his hand, and Ness shakes it]
Malone: Do you know what a blood oath is, Mr. Ness?
Ness: Yes.
Malone: Good, ’cause you just took one.

Malone:  You said you wanted to get Capone. Do you really wanna get him? You see what I’m saying is, what are you prepared to do?
Ness: Anything and everything in my power.
Malone: And *then* what are you prepared to do? If you open the can on these worms you must be prepared to go all the way because they’re not gonna give up the fight until one of you is dead.
Ness: How do you do it then?
Malone: You wanna know how you do it? Here’s how, they pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. That’s the Chicago way, and that’s how you get Capone! Now do you want to do that? Are you ready to do that?
Ness: I have sworn to capture this man with all legal powers at my disposal and I will do so.
Malone: Well, the Lord hates a coward. Do you know what a blood oath is, Mr. Ness?
Ness: Yes.
Malone: Good, ’cause you just took one.

Malone: Isn’t that just like a wop? Brings a knife to a gun fight.

[Ness has just shot a gangster after the Canadian border raid]
Ness: I had to kill him.
Malone: Oh, yeah. He’s as dead as Julius Caesar… Would you rather it was you?
Ness: No, I would not.
Malone: Well, then, you’ve done your job. Go home and sleep well tonight.

Malone: You’re muckin’ with a G here, pal!

Malone: OK, pal, why the mahaska? Why are you carrying the gun?
Ness: I’m a treasury officer.
Malone: Alright. Just remember what we talked about now.
[Malone walks away]
Ness: Hey, wait a minute! What the hell kind of policemen you got in this god damn city? You just turned your back on an armed man.
Malone: You’re a treasury officer.
Ness: How do you know that? I just told you that.
Malone: Who would claim to be that who was not? Hmm?

 


Malone: The hell you say. You going to talk?
[beat]
Malone: You’re gonna talk, pal. You’re gonna beg to talk. Somebody’s going to talk. Hey you, on your feet. We need you to translate this book. And you are going to. I won’t ask you again. What’s the matter. Can’t you talk with a gun in your mouth? One… two… three…

Malone: Don’t wait for it to happen. Don’t even want it to happen. Just watch what does happen.

Malone: [after a plan goes wrong] Oh what the hell? You gotta die of something.

Malone: [to Ness] Welcome to Chicago.
Malone: This town stinks like a whorehouse at low tide.

Malone: If you’re afraid of getting a rotten apple, don’t go to the barrel. Get it off the tree.

 


Ness: Come on Capone! You wanna fight? You wanna settle it right now? Right here? Let’s go!
Capone: Listen to me here! You ain’t got nothin’ on me, nothin’! You’re just a cop! Fuck you and your family!
Ness: Fuh… know what?
[Ness goes to pull his gun, Capone’s goons pull their guns and point them at Ness]
Malone: Not now Eliot, not now.
[Malone grabs Ness]

Malone: Get outta here you dago bastared!

Malone: [firing his gun to stop a suspect] All right! Enough of this running shit!

Ness: [looking at a gold chain Malone is holding] What is that?
Malone: Ah, I’m among the heathen. That is my call box key, and that… is my St. Jude medallion.
Ness: Saint who?
George Stone: Santo Jude. The patron saint of lost causes.
Malone: And policemen.
Ness: Well, which are we, gentlemen – policemen, or lost causes?

Malone: [stopping at a post office] Well, here we are.
Ness: What are we doing here?
Malone: Liquor raid.
Ness: [looking at the police station across the street] Here?
Malone: Mr. Ness, everybody knows where the booze is. The problem isn’t finding it, the problem is who wants to cross Capone.

Malone: You, you carry a badge?
Agent Oscar Wallace: Yes?
Malone: [gives him a shotgun] Carry a gun.

Please share other Connery quotes or any other thoughts/memories you have about the film in the comments below.  Thank you for your interest in Sean Connery and The Untouchables.

Post by Chad Elkins. Source: IMDB

Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade Film Quotes

Sean Connery as Professor Henry Jones in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)


Professor Henry Jones: You call *this* archaeology?

Principal SS Officer at Castle: [the Nazis burst into the room] Dr. Jones?
Professor Henry Jones, Indiana Jones: Yes?
Principal SS Officer at Castle: I will take zuh book now.
Professor Henry Jones, Indiana Jones: Wuh-what b-book?
Principal SS Officer at Castle: You have zuh diary in your pocket.
Professor Henry Jones: You dolt! You think my son would be that stupid? That he would bring my diary all the way back here?
[pause]
Professor Henry Jones: You didn’t, did you?
[another pause]
Professor Henry Jones: You didn’t bring it, did you?
Indiana Jones: Well, uh…
Professor Henry Jones: You *did*!
Indiana Jones: Look, can we discuss this later?
Professor Henry Jones: I should have mailed it to the Marx Brothers!
Indiana Jones: Will you take it easy?
Professor Henry Jones: Take it easy? Why do you think I sent it home in the first place? So it wouldn’t fall into their hands!
Indiana Jones: I came here to SAVE you!
Professor Henry Jones: Oh, yeah? And who’s gonna come to save you, JUNIOR?
Indiana Jones: [shouts] I *told* you…
Indiana Jones: [grabs a gun and shoots all soldiers dead]
Indiana Jones: …DON’T call me Junior!
Professor Henry Jones: Look what you did! I can’t *believe* what you did!

Professor Henry Jones: Junior?
Indiana Jones: Yes, sir.
Professor Henry Jones: It *is* you, Junior.
Indiana Jones: Don’t call me that. *Please*.

Professor Henry Jones: The quest for the grail is not archeology, it’s a race against evil. If it is captured by the Nazis the armies of darkness will march all over the face of the earth. Do you understand me?
Indiana Jones: This is an obsession, Dad. I’ve never understood it. Never. Neither did Mom.
Professor Henry Jones: Oh yes she did. Only too well. Unfortunately, she kept her illness from me. All I could do was mourn her.

Elsa: [to Indy] I’ll never forget how vonderful it vas.
Professor Henry Jones: Why thank you. It was rather wonderful.
Elsa: [kisses Indy] Zat’s how Austrians say goodbye.
Colonel Vogel: Und zis is how ve zay goodbye in Germany, Dr. Jones.
[punches Indy with the head of his cane; Indy’s head smacks into Henry’s behind him]
Indiana Jones: I liked the Austrian way better.
Professor Henry Jones: So did I.

Professor Henry Jones: Those people are trying to kill us!
Indiana Jones: [shouts] I know, Dad!
Professor Henry Jones: This is a new experience for me.
Indiana Jones: It happens to me all the time.

[after commandeering a plane]
Professor Henry Jones: I didn’t know you could fly a plane.
Indiana Jones: Fly, yes. Land, no.

[Nazi Colonel Vogel is torturing Henry to get answers]
Colonel Vogel: Tell me about this miserable little diary of yours. The book is useless and yet you come all the way back to Berlin to get it. Why?
[he slaps Henry in the face with his glove]
Colonel Vogel: Why?
[he slaps him again]
Colonel Vogel: What are you hiding?
[he slaps him again]
Colonel Vogel: What does the diary tell you that it doesn’t tell us?
[he tries to slap him again; Henry grabs his wrist, stopping him]
Professor Henry Jones: [through his teeth] It tells me, that goose-stepping morons like yourself should try *reading* books instead of *burning* them!

[talking about how they both slept with the same woman]
Indiana Jones: It’s disgraceful, you’re old enough to be her… her grandfather.
Professor Henry Jones: Well, I’m as human as the next man.
Indiana Jones: Dad, I *was* the next man.
Professor Henry Jones: Oh… ships that pass in the night.

Professor Henry Jones: I’m sorry about your head though. But I thought that you were one of them.
Indiana Jones: Dad, they come in through the doors.
Professor Henry Jones: Ha, good point.

Professor Henry Jones: Elsa never really believed in the grail. She thought she’d found a prize.
Indiana Jones: And what did you find, Dad?
Professor Henry Jones: Me? Illumination.

[to Indiana, while watching a Nazi parade and book burning]
Professor Henry Jones: My son, we’re pilgrims in an unholy land.

[last lines]
Marcus Brody: Indy, Henry, follow me. I know the way. Ha!
[Marcus’ horse rides off with him barely hanging onto it]
Professor Henry Jones: Got lost in his own museum, eh?
Indiana Jones: Uh-huh.
Professor Henry Jones: After you, Junior.
Indiana Jones: Yes, sir. Ha!

[Indiana and Henry are tied up]
Indiana Jones: Come on, dad. Help me get us out of here. We have to get to Marcus before the Nazis do.
Professor Henry Jones: But you said he had a two day head start. That he would blend in, disappear.
Indiana Jones: Are you kidding? I made all that up. You know Marcus. He once got lost in his own museum.

Professor Henry Jones: [Examining the broken vase] Late 14th Ming Dynasty. Oh it breaks the heart.
Indiana Jones: And the head. You hit me dad.
Professor Henry Jones: I’ll never forgive myself.
Indiana Jones: Don’t worry I’m all right.
Professor Henry Jones: Thank God… it’s fake. See you can tell with the cross sections.

Elsa: It’s perfectly obvious where the pages are. He’s given them to Marcus Brody.
Professor Henry Jones: Marcus? You didn’t drag poor Marcus along did you? He’s not up to the challenge.
Walter Donovan: He sticks out like a sore thumb. We’ll find him.
Indiana Jones: The hell you will. He’s got a two day head start on you, which is more than he needs. Brody’s got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he’ll blend in, disappear, you’ll never see him again. With any luck, he’s got the grail already.
[Cut to middle of fair in the Middle East, Marcus Brody wearing bright suit and white hat, sticking out like sore thumb]
Marcus Brody: Uhhh, does anyone here speak English?

Professor Henry Jones: Junior, I have tell you something.
Indiana Jones: Don’t get sentimental now dad, save it until we get out of here.
Professor Henry Jones: The floor’s on fire… see… AND the chair.

Indiana Jones: It was just the two of us, dad. It was a lonely way to grow up. For you, too. If you had been an ordinary, average father like the other guys’ dads, you’d have understood that.
Professor Henry Jones: Actually, I was a wonderful father.
Indiana Jones: When?
Professor Henry Jones: Did I ever tell you to eat up? Go to bed? Wash your ears? Do your homework? No. I respected your privacy and I taught you self- reliance.
Indiana Jones: What you taught me was that I was less important to you than people who had been dead for five hundred years in another country. And I learned it so well that we’ve hardly spoken for twenty years.
Professor Henry Jones: You left just when you were becoming interesting.

Professor Henry Jones: I suddenly remembered my Charlemagne. Let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky…

Professor Henry Jones: Marcus.
Marcus Brody: Aah.
Professor Henry Jones: Genius of the res-to-ration.
[Brody finishes the handshake]
Marcus Brody: Aid our own re-sus-ci-tation. Henry, what are you doing here?
Professor Henry Jones: It’s a rescue. Come on.
[the Nazis catch both Marcus and Henry]

Professor Henry Jones: You say this has been just another typical day for you huh?
Indiana Jones: NO. It’s been better than most.

Indiana Jones: [of Indy’s new lover] How did you know she was a Nazi?
Professor Henry Jones: She talks in her sleep.

[Vogel is holding Elsa hostage at gunpoint]
Colonel Vogel: Throw down the gun or the girl will die.
Professor Henry Jones: But she’s one of them.
Elsa: Indy, please!
Professor Henry Jones: She’s a Nazi.
Indiana Jones: What?
Professor Henry Jones: Trust me.
Elsa: Indy, help!
Colonel Vogel: I will kill her!
Professor Henry Jones: Oh yeah? Go ahead.
Indiana Jones: No! Don’t shoot!
Professor Henry Jones: Don’t worry. He won’t.
Elsa: Indy, please do what he says!
Professor Henry Jones: And don’t listen to her.
Colonel Vogel: Enough! She dies!
Indiana Jones: Wait! Wait.
[Indy tosses over the gun. Vogel lets Elsa go and she runs right into Indy’s arms]
Elsa: I’m sorry.
Indiana Jones: Don’t be.
[Elsa takes the grail diary from Indy’s pocket, smiles, then hands it to Vogel]
Elsa: But you should have listened to your father.


Professor Henry Jones: The Word of God.
Marcus Brody: No, Henry. Try not to talk.
Professor Henry Jones: The Name of God.
Indiana Jones: The Name of God… Jehovah.
Professor Henry Jones: But in the Latin alphabet, “Jehovah” begins with an “I”.
Indiana Jones: J-…
[he steps on the “J” and almost falls to his death; he scrambles back up]
Indiana Jones: Oh, *idiot*! In Latin Jehovah begins with an “I”!

[Henry, struggling with a Nazi for a gun, uses his fountain pen to blind the Nazi]
Marcus Brody: Henry, the pen.
Professor Henry Jones: What?
Marcus Brody: Well don’t you see? The pen is mightier than the sword.

[Indy has untied a boat as a diversion for the Nazis]
Indiana Jones: Come on, Dad! Come on!
Professor Henry Jones: What about the boat? We’re not going on the boat?

Professor Henry Jones: [to Indy] Well, I didn’t trust her. Why did you?
Walter Donovan: Because he didn’t take my advice. Didn’t I tell you not to trust anyone, Dr. Jones?

Professor Henry Jones: Stop. You’re going the wrong way. We need to get to Berlin.
Indiana Jones: Brody’s this way.
Professor Henry Jones: My diary’s in Berlin.
Indiana Jones: We don’t need the diary, Dad. Marcus has the map.
Professor Henry Jones: There is more in the diary than just the map.

Professor Henry Jones: Well, he who finds the Grail must face the final challenge.
Indiana Jones: What final challenge?
Professor Henry Jones: Three devices of such lethal cunning.
Indiana Jones: Booby traps?
Professor Henry Jones: Oh yes. But I found the clues that will safely take us through, in the Chronicles of St. Anselm.
Indiana Jones: But what are they?
[pause]
Indiana Jones: Can’t you remember?
Professor Henry Jones: I wrote them down in my Diary so that I wouldn’t *have* to remember.

Indiana Jones: Half the German army’s on our tail and you want me to go to Berlin? Into the lion’s den?
Professor Henry Jones: Yes. The only thing that matters is the Grail.
Indiana Jones: What about Marcus?
Professor Henry Jones: Marcus would agree with me!

Indiana Jones: Jesus Christ…
Professor Henry Jones: [slaps him] That’s for blasphemy.

Professor Henry Jones: I misjudged you, Walter. I knew you would sell your mother for an Etruscan vase. But I didn’t know you would sell out your country and your soul… to the slime of humanity.

[Indiana Jones and Professor Jones Sr. are trapped between a room on fire and a room full of Nazis]
Professor Henry Jones: Our situation has not improved.

Professor Henry Jones: [after hearing that Indy read the tablet] If only I could have been there with you.
Indiana Jones: There were rats, Dad.
Professor Henry Jones: [Startled] Rats?

[Indy and his father have boarded the airship]
Indiana Jones: Well, we made it!
Professor Henry Jones: [looking out from behind his newspaper] When we are airborne, with Germany behind us, *then* I will share that sentiment!

[Indy and his father have stolen a plane from the airship, and are now being chased by German fighters]
Indiana Jones: Dad, you’re going to have to use the machine gun. Get it ready!
[Henry turns around and gets the gun ready]
Indiana Jones: [spotting an approaching fighter] 11 o’clock! Dad, 11 o’clock!
Professor Henry Jones: [looking at his watch] What happens at 11 o’clock?

Professor Henry Jones: I find, that if I just sit down to think…
[sits in chair, which tilts backward and opens up a hidden staircase]
Indiana Jones: [falling down hidden staircase] Daaaaad!
Professor Henry Jones: [resetting chair legs] The solution presents itself!

Professor Henry Jones: [accidentally shoots their own plane with the machine gun]
Indiana Jones: Dad, are we hit?
Professor Henry Jones: More or less. Son, I’m sorry. They got us.

Indiana Jones: [as the room is burning] Dad!
Professor Henry Jones: What?
Indiana Jones: Dad!
Professor Henry Jones: What?
Indiana Jones: DAD!
Professor Henry Jones: WHAT?
Indiana Jones: Dad, head for the fireplace!

[repeated line]
Professor Henry Jones: This is intolerable!

[Indiana slips and nearly falls into the abyss, but Henry grabs his hand]
Professor Henry Jones: Junior, give me your other hand! I can’t hold on!
Indiana Jones: [reaching for the Grail] I can get it. I can almost reach it, Dad…
Professor Henry Jones: Indiana.
[surprised, Indy looks up at his father]
Professor Henry Jones: Indiana… let it go.

Sallah: Please, what does it always mean, this… this “Junior”?
Professor Henry Jones: That’s his name.
[points to himself]
Professor Henry Jones: Henry Jones…
[points to Indy]
Professor Henry Jones: …Junior.
Indiana Jones: I like “Indiana.”
Professor Henry Jones: We named the *dog* Indiana.
Marcus Brody: May we go home now, please?
Sallah: The dog?
[starts laughing]
Sallah: You are named after the dog? HA HA HA…!
Indiana Jones: I’ve got a lot of fond memories of that dog.

Professor Henry Jones: And in this sort of race, there’s no silver medal for finishing second.


Indiana Jones: [Being tied up together] We gotta get free, dad. We’ve gotts get to Marcus before the Nazis do.
Professor Henry Jones: I thought that Marcus had a 2 day head start, and would vanish, disappear.
Indiana Jones: No. I made that up. C’mon dad, you know Marcus he got lost in one of his own museums one time. Dad, can you reach into my left pocket?
Professor Henry Jones: What will I find?
Indiana Jones: [Sarcastically] A lucky charm.
Professor Henry Jones: [Reaches into Indy’s left jacket pocket] Feels like a cigarette lighter.
Indiana Jones: Use it to burn the ropes.
[Then Henry lights thew lighter and reaches back and burns himself androps the lighter to the floor, and after blowing on it a few times he starts a fire]
Professor Henry Jones: Son, there’s something I have to tell you.
Indiana Jones: Don’t get sentimental now dad, save until we get out.
Professor Henry Jones: The floor is in fire, and the chair.

Professor Henry Jones: [after escaping from the Nazis, and coming onto a road sign] Wait, we got to get to Berlin.
Indiana Jones: [Points to the Sign] Brody’s *this* way.
Professor Henry Jones: But, my Diary’s in Berlin.
Indiana Jones: We don’t need the Diary, Dad Marcus has the map.
Professor Henry Jones: There’s more to the Grail than *just the map*.
Indiana Jones: [Stops the motorcycle] Okay dad. What is it?
Professor Henry Jones: 3 devices of lethal cunning.
Indiana Jones: Booby traps?
Professor Henry Jones: Yes, and I have found a way to pass right by them.
Indiana Jones: [Becoming angry] Half the German army’s on our tail, and you want me to go to *Berlin* into the lion’s den?
Professor Henry Jones: Yes.
Indiana Jones: I can’t believe this, Jesus Christ.
Professor Henry Jones: [Slaps Indy in the face] That’s for blasphemy. The quest for the Holy Grail is not about Archeology, it’s a race against evil, if it’s found by the Nazis, the armies of darkness will amrch across the face of the Earth, please understand.
Indiana Jones: [Very annoyed] This is an obession dad, I never understood it, never. Neither did mom.
Professor Henry Jones: oh yes she did, just all too well. But she kept her illness from me, all i could do is mourn her.

Indiana Jones: [Looking through his binoculars and seeing a tank] 12 pound gun.
Professor Henry Jones: What are you doing? Get down.
Indiana Jones: Dad, we’re well out of range.
[the tanks fires on them]


Indiana Jones: I can remeber the last time we had a drink together. I had a milkshake. but, we didn’t talk, we’ve never talked. Only if you were a regular dad just like the other boy’s dad, this would be different.
Professor Henry Jones: I was a wonderful father.
Indiana Jones: Yeah, how?
Professor Henry Jones: Did I ever tell you to eat up, go to bed, wash your ears, do your homework? No, I respected your privacy and I taught you self reliance.
Indiana Jones: What you taught me, is that I was less important to you than people that have been dead for several hundered years and in other countries, and I learned it so well, that we’ve hardly spoken for 20 years.
Professor Henry Jones: You left, just as you were becoming interesting.
[Closes his diary]
Professor Henry Jones: Okay, I ‘m here what you wanna talk about?
Indiana Jones: [At a lost for words] I… I don’t know.
Professor Henry Jones: Then, what are you complaining about? Now, he who finds the Grail must face 3 challenges. First, is the path of God: Only the pennative man shall pass. Second, is the word of God: Only in the footsteps of God, shall he proceed. Last is the breath of God: Only a leap from the lion’s head, shall he prove his worth.

Please share other Connery quotes or any other thoughts/memories you have about the film in the comments below.  Thank you for your interest in Sean Connery and Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.

Post by Chad Elkins. Source: IMDB